Tag / Defector

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Tired Discourse – Do Bisexuals Exist?

In January of 2025, the good folks at Defector.com published a list of 35 topics that have been discussed to within an inch of their life here on the internet.  Lucky for me, I haven’t publicly commented on most, if not all, of these topics, so I figured why not dip my toes into the fray on occasion.  We will continue today with the third question on their list:

Do Bisexuals Exist?

Yes.

Oh, you want more? I think one of the biggest fallacies of human existence is that sexuality is a binary.  There is so much evidence, both in human behavior and in animal behavior in nature, that proves otherwise, that sexuality is a spectrum.  Some people (probably less than you think) do tilt the extreme ends of each side of the spectrum, while the vast majority fall somewhere along the line.

There’s an old saying that “all women are inherently bisexual” and I think the truth to that is that it is more socially acceptable for women to show any form of bisexuality than it is for men.  Two drunk “straight” women kissing at a party is met with raucous cheers.  Imagine the reaction if two men did the same.

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Tired Discourse – Tipping

In January of 2025, the good folks at Defector.com published a list of 35 topics that have been discussed to within an inch of their life here on the internet.  Lucky for me, I haven’t publicly commented on most, if not all, of these topics, so I figured why not dip my toes into the fray on occasion.  We will continue today with the third question on their list:

Tipping

To start, here are two things that are absolutely true:

  1. If you can’t afford to tip, then you can’t afford to go out
  2. Tipping culture has gotten way out of control post-lockdown

Look, in a perfect world, servers would be paid a proper wage by their employers and tipping could then truly be reserved as a reward for excellent service.  We, however, do not live in a perfect world.  If you don’t want to tip, or can’t afford to tip, then the harsh reality is that you need to refrain from frequenting those establishments where tipping is legitimately required.  It isn’t fair to make some worker essentially pay to take care of you because you don’t think the social contract applies to you.

You’ll notice I said legitimately required, though.  Post-COVID, the number of POS systems explicitly asking for, if not totally expecting, a tip has exploded tenfold.  I am not the bad guy if I don’t add a tip my total at the local gyros shop.  If I go to a pizza place to pick up my own pie, you do not get a tip.  Handing me a pre-wrapped hot dog at a concession stand at the ballpark is also not a scenario where a tip is required.

What about tip percentages?  This is obviously going to vary by location.  The old standard of 15% doesn’t seem to cut it anymore, but 20% seems more than fair.  There are plenty of AI generated memes on the social media channels that will claim you should be giving upwards of 30% and some of the pre-programmed choices on these new POS systems do tend towards a higher payout, but that doesn’t mean you need to do it.

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Tired Discourse – How Early You Should Get To The Airport

In January of 2025, the good folks at Defector.com published a list of 35 topics that have been discussed to within an inch of their life here on the internet.  Lucky for me, I haven’t publicly commented on most, if not all, of these topics, so I figured why not dip my toes into the fray on occasion.  We will continue today with the second question on their list:

How Early You Should Get to the Airport

I have experienced the two complete opposite sides of this spectrum, so I think I can provide some good insight.  Once, in order to save some money on a night at the hotel in Las Vegas, I arrived at the airport the night before my early morning flight.  (Side note: I do not recommend this.)  Another time, due to an accident and unplanned for traffic, I was still on my way to the airport as my flight began boarding.  Neither situation is optimal.

The hard part is that there is no clear cut, across the board answer and, even if there were, variables like distance you are travelling to the airport and traffic conditions along the way will make hitting that target time extremely difficult.  Plus, each individual person is going to have different stressors, so even finding an ideal answer among a single travelling party may not be possible.

Anyway, this is boring.  Find what makes you comfortable and try to show up then.

 

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Tired Discourse – Is Die Hard A Christmas Movie

In January of 2025, the good folks at Defector.com published a list of 35 topics that have been discussed to within an inch of their life here on the internet.  Lucky for me, I haven’t publicly commented on most, if not all, of these topics, so I figured why not dip my toes into the fray on occasion.  We will start today with the first question on their list:

Is Die Hard a Christmas Movie?

Die Hard, the now-classic action movie released in July of 1988, stars Bruce Willis as a New York city police officer who travels to Los Angeles to see his estranged wife and kids and ends up interrupting a terrorist attack, saving his wife and (most of) her co-workers from a certain death.  At first glance, nothing about this screams Christmas movie.  But, the movie’s setup only works because the action takes place on Christmas Eve.

Why is Willis’s Det. John McClane in Los Angeles?  To see his family for Christmas.  Why is he meeting his wife at her office?  It’s their Christmas party.  Why are the terrorists attacking now?  It is Christmas Eve and, aside from the people at the party, who are needed to give the terrorists the access they need, the building is deserted.

Now, detractors will say that you can strip out the Christmas trappings and have basically the same movie.  Which, for the most part, is probably true.  That said, those trappings are not stripped out and very much exist in the film, tying it directly to the holiday season.

So, bottom line, is Die Hard a Christmas movie?  Of course it is.  Is it a traditional Christmas movie.  No, I will concede that point.  But Christmas drives the plot, in the movie as it actually exists versus some make-believe alternate version.  And what embodies the spirit of Christmas more than overcoming obstacles of circumstance to reunite with your loved ones for the holiday?

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Book 58 (of 52) – The Postmortal

The Postmortal – Drew Magary

When a cure for aging is discovered, humanity has to deal with the repercussions of elongated life spans and the strain that causes on natural resources.  One man finds that, despite near-immortality, he still suffers incalculable loss after loss.  When the end finally comes, is he finally ready to say goodbye?

The Postmortal, the debut novel from Defector blogger Drew Magary, tackles the question of what purpose does life serve if it never ends.  What does marriage look like when “til death do us part” is a much longer commitment?  Where does God fit in if man is able to control his own lifespan?  These are intriguing questions and, while the execution isn’t 100% spot on, it is good enough to convey an interesting tale.

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Prolific Authors – Three Books

It is time once again to take a look at the authors I have read the most, dating back to high school.  This year, I’m once again on pace to set a new record for books read in a year, so I thought it would be nice to take a deeper dive into those books I’ve read through August of this year. Since our last check-in, I’ve read an additional 114 books, so there should be some movement over the past two years.  Without further ado, it’s time to take another look and see if my “favorite” authors have changed much over the years.  We continue today with the 21 authors I’ve read three times, one more than two years ago.

Kevin J. Anderson

Last read in the 20th century, he’s responsible for three of the X-Files books on my shelf.

Fredrik Backman

This Swedish author has become a recent favorite, showing up once a year prior to last year, with more to come, I’m sure.

The 22 Murders of Madison May – Max Barry

Max Barry

After a 17-year break, Barry returned to my attention in 2024 with The 22 Murders of Madison May.

Adam Carolla

The former comedian and current right-wing nutjob managed to get me to read three of his podcast regurgitations before being driven away.

Bill Carter

The former media reporter for the New York Times delivered three behind the scenes looks at the television industry, including the transition from Johnny Carson to Jay Leno and from Jay Leno to Conan O’Brien and back again.

Supreme Justice – Max Allan Collins

Max Allan Collins

Author of all entries of the Reeder and Rogers trilogy.

Keith R.A. DeCandido

Two Buffy the Vampire Slayer novels and a Spider-Man novel make up his works.

Diane Duane

A 23-year absence was broken in 2023 thanks to Intellivore, an entry in the Star Trek: The Next Generation series.

The Fireman – Joe Hill

Joe Hill

The son of Stephen King crossed my path again following a seven-year break.

Luke Jennings

The basis of the television show Killing Eve, Jennings’ trilogy takes a wildly different path.

David Lagercrantz

Stieg Larsson

Stieg Larsson wrote the first three entries in the story of Lisbeth Salander.  Following his death, David Lagercrantz continued the series with three entries of his own.

Continue reading →

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Prolific Authors – 3 Books

Way back in December of 2011 (and again every other December since), we’ve taken a look at the authors I have read the most, dating back to high school.  Since I’ve far surpassed my “normal” reading output the last three yeas, I thought it would be nice to once again take a deeper dive into those books I’ve read through the start of October. Since our last check-in, I’ve read an additional 118 books, so there could be some movement over the past two years, but it’s time to take another look and see if my “favorite” authors have changed much in that time span.  We continue today with the 20 authors I’ve read thrice, an increase of eight over the past two years.

Kevin J. Anderson

Last read in the 20th century, he’s responsible for three of the X-Files books on my shelf.

A Man Called Ove – Fredrik Backman

Fredrik Backman

This Swedish author has become a recent favorite, showing up once a year over the past three years, with more to come, I’m sure.

Adam Carolla

The former comedian and current right-wing nutjob managed to get me to read three of his podcast regurgitations.

Bill Carter

The former media reporter for the New York Times delivered three behind the scenes looks at the television industry, including the transition from Johnny Carson to Jay Leno and from Jay Leno to Conan O’Brien and back again.

Executive Order – Max Allan Collins

Max Allan Collins

Author of all entries of the Reeder and Rogers trilogy.

Suzanne Collins

The woman behind a little trilogy about a young woman named Katniss who upends her entire world.

Keith R.A. DeCandido

Two Buffy the Vampire Slayer novels and a Spider-Man novel make up his works.

Alex Finlay

A DC lawyer writing under a penname, Finlay has placed three books in my hands over the past two years.

The Guest List – Lucy Foley

Lucy Foley

Another recent fave, Foley, a New York Times best seller, has shown up annually since 2021.

Megan Goldin

The former Reuters correspondent first appeared on my radar in 2021 with her debut, The Escape Room.

Paula Hawkins

Continue reading →

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Book 4 (of 52) – God Spare The Girls

God Spare The Girls – Kelsey McKinney

18-year-old Caroline is looking towards her last summer at home, culminating with her sister’s wedding, when the bombshell of her father’s affair drops.  With her faith in her father (and her Father) rattled, she and her sister move in to their grandmother’s old ranch, where they grow closer together and look towards their individual future plans.  When her father’s affair is swept under the rug, both at church and at home, Caroline tries to decide if she can forgive him or it she’s ready to blaze her own path.

I was familiar with Kelsey McKinney’s non-fiction writing as a blogger at Defector.com, so I decided to dive in to God Spare The Girls, her debut novel without much advance information as to its subject matter.  I’m not sure what I expected, but a coming-of-age story about the daughter of a megachurch pastor was certainly not it.  I did find myself rooting for the characters to get their happy endings, which I would say one did and one didn’t, and it was certainly well-written, but this really didn’t fall into my wheelhouse.  Maybe next time I’ll take a closer look at the subject matter before checking the book out of the library.

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Book 1 (of 52) – The Night The Lights Went Out

The Night The Lights Went Out: A Memoir of Life After Brain Damage – Drew Magary

In December of 2018, Deadspin writer Drew Magary was in New York, hosting a fan event and going to an after-party with his co-workers.  Two weeks later, he woke up in a New York hospital, where he had been in a coma ever since he collapsed that night with a brain hemorrhage.  The Night The Lights Went Out is the story of his injury, road to recovery, and what he learned along the way about letting the man he was go so he could become comfortable with the man he now was.

Magary published a version of this story on Deadspin in May of 2019, before that entire site imploded later that year.  He fleshed out the initial injury, interviewing family, friends, and doctors who retained memories of the night and days that Magary did not.  His recovery also lasted more than five months, eventually undergoing surgery for a cochlear implant, undergoing smell therapy, and seeing a therapist to deal with his ongoing anger.

Aside from his blogging work, first on Deadspin and now on Defector, I’ve also read two of Magary’s novels, one of which he seemingly finished and self-published in the midst of all of this.  I was familiar with the main beats of his story, but going through the details and the long fight to get back to normal, before abandoning that fight and coming to grips with what normal now was, was a completely different beast.